Perhaps you are hoping to blend in. Maybe you have found the perfect hiding place. Or you are just happy to keep the game moving on.

But there is another way.

And that way is the proposition of possibility. A way of generating and governing the problem space. You might call it a pitch.

Done badly, I’m with you, it is a shot to nothing, a pitch.

But done right it creates meaning, trust, and change. And perhaps that is the point.



Keep painting the same horizontal line on a canvas and soon enough paint will accumulate and begin to drip down. Once a drip begins to roll, it’s not clear how far it will roll.

The metaphor created by Kent Beck describes a generalist who acquires specialised knowledge when required and for as deep as is necessary.

Most coaches are technical specialists who like to paint in vertical lines. Going deep into a skill set on the assumption that it will be necessary.

The problem comes when a specialist needs to generalise. Because the paint runs in a vertical line when it comes to painting a horizontal line there is little or no paint to take across.

Parents, coaches, and teachers when it comes to kids be careful where you put the paint.



Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

Maybe you have a love-hate relationship with your coach. And maybe that’s the point. To explore the edges try this at the end of a session, a workshop, or an event.

I like…..

I wish….

A chance to build on what is working and suggest improvements for what is not.

Change is hard and unreasonable but that doesn’t mean it always has to be that way.



Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

In the gap between converging and diverging ideas lives possibility.

Close the space, crowd out the senses, and soon enough possibility disappears. If we understood sensory and cognitive load would we still act the way we do? I doubt it.

Possibility requires space. A space big enough for ideas to breathe, unfold and take shape.

Like a beating heart, the opening and closing of space bring to life our ideas.



You want your idea to develop and blossom to fruition as any parent would.

Your agent wants your idea to sell, just like any agent would.

Ideas like kids don’t come with instructions, but if they did, they would say, handle with care.



Image by 愚木混株 Cdd20 from Pixabay

“Go for Quantity”

Put plenty of ideas in a room and guess what? You get more. Chopped and changed, mutated, and reformed. Maybe that’s the point but not when you need to make a choice.

“Defer Judgement”

Exactly what you want to hear when you need to change your mind. Not what you want to hear when you need to make a choice.

“Let’s stay focussed”

You might be on task yet you want to focus on the future.

Confusion or clarity is created in the moment. don’t waste it.



Image by Jan Kuss from Pixabay

No question it pays to have skills that pay the bills.

Knowing how to make a coffee


Serve a table

Skills that have a market value.

The problem comes when the value of the skills is not clear.

Sure we can teach skills in the hope we find a use for them in the game we are playing.

But perhaps it makes more sense to play the game and only then work to acquire skills that actually help us play a better game.



Image by sergei akulich from Pixabay

It’s clear most people like a list. Lists can make us sound clear and decisive, providing us with an illusion of control.

But not everyone likes a list.

Maybe we are avoiding things or worried about control and authoritarianism.

If lists are power, making a list of what you actually control is a good place to start. I’ve made a start for you.

Your time

Your response

How you show up



Image by Lisa Caroselli from Pixabay

Behind every kid who receives a participation award is a parent who has dragged their kid to practice when they don’t feel like it.

My kids had a lie-in today. I quit coaching football on a Sunday this season, and the kids have no obligations.

I struggled with it for a while, I felt the urge for them to be doing something until I realised that I trust my kids. Day after day, hour after hour, cycling to school whatever the weather, does that.

There is no punchline. Just a point of reflection. Who is it for?