Speak up

Simon A Harling
2 min readJun 1, 2022

I write to help coaches, teachers, and parents commit to what is important to them.

Let me tell you a story about my two kids that might help.

My eldest is quiet, unassertive, and happy to go along for the ride. My youngest is on the fake it till you make it tip, and it works often enough, for now at least.

The eldest has on her wall “I will speak even if my voice shakes.”

The youngest. “Sometimes you win and sometimes you learn.”

In reality, my eldest says very little and occasionally erupts at her little sister when it’s not going to plan. And the younger is too busy being angry every time it doesn’t come off to learn very much at all.

Nothing really worked. The journaling. Not even the long life lessons from dad.

Until we started to introduce the idea of the eldest asking questions. Rather than “I want” or “ I feel” it was about asking a question. The eldest had an idea about what she wanted or how she felt but was not ready to verbalise it. Easier to begin with a question.

The youngest now had someone who challenged her thinking.

And here is my point.

Whether we are on a fake til we make it tip or happy to follow someone else. If we are happy to accept that we are products of our environment. The smart move is to speak up, learn to accept the challenge, and begin to explore.

Here are some edges for you to explore with your kids, partner, teachers, and coaches.

Sport Specific Skills — Functional Movement Skills

Uncontested — Contested

Niche — Developed

Fast — Slow

Chaos — Control

Success — Failure

Simple — Complex

Follow — Lead

Safe — Unsafe

Certain — Uncertain

Engaged — Compliant

Self-Paced — Timed

In Sync — Out of Sync

Isolation — Collaboration

Strength — Endurance

Stiff — Flexible

Mobile — Stuck

Accurate — Inaccurate

Begin by asking questions, it might just be the easiest place to start. And then in time learn to ask better ones.

After all, anyone who cares about what they do loves to talk about what they do.

The alternative is to pretend to know or just not say.

--

--

Simon A Harling

Learning to live with others (coaching), living my best life (fitness), & sharing what I am working on (writing) https://linktr.ee/SimonHarling